Benny Speaks ;
4:33 PM, Wednesday, March 28, 2007 ;
k brand new year, brand new bloginning =) ok abit late i know but wth~ anyway my 1st post aren't gonna b pleasent =\
last friday morning (23rd) round 3-ish 4-ish, my great grandma past away due to some cardio infection... damn saddening, coz i did spent e 1st 1/4 of life with her everyday, n also coz it happened all too sudden...
well anyway during e wake from friday noon to tuesday noon, its been both at times fun and interesting, as well as sad n emotional...
getting together with some of e
fun-ner n more open relatives nvr proves too awkward an affair for me (not too sure bout my sister). joking n laughing freely bout stuffs n each other regardless of the "generations" n "seniority" =)
but looking at how much we've grown n how much more "awareness" we've aquired over e months n years apart is rather scary =\
etc. uncle see yeh n aunt wee yen's case (siblings, 26 & 27 respectively, incase u wanna know). 15 years back we were still playing n laughing together, n in e blink of an eye here we r in e 21st century, still binded down by a 6000 year old tradition, have to treat em with e unfamiliar n strangest of utmost
elderly respect.
imagine, someone as close as a friend n brother n sister to u once is now ur uncle and aunt ? pretty scary change huh ?
well e cremation wasn't such a nice affair... ppl i've nvr seen of even dare imagine wld breakdown just suddenly... broke down =( its only ytd tat great grandma got cremated but e emotional burdens n sadness of not doing more den wat we cld do for her (in most cases, way under wat we
shd b doing) still lingers on even now...
just somehow, i miss her, i miss everyone, even my brother n sister, back when i was b4 6 years old... everything seems so simple, so logical, so calm n peaceful... my own changes n my current mindset scares me...
so sad rite ? hahaha... can't b helped... i've lost someone i love once, n just did again, only after they were gone... i dun want tis kinda regrat n late-ness again...
bah~ i guess tats all for a 1st post =) just know tat i'll begin to treasure everyone around me tis moment on, n i'll try to meet everyone with a thought of appreciation for their slightest presence n support =)
yes, u're all missed (especially after 5 days away) =)
light my way
